A quote that came out of it and really struck a chord with me is
"Unforgiveness is like drinking a poison and expecting someone else to die from it."
It's an interesting thought. You always imagine the poisoner (hehe yes I think I just made that up) watching with anticipation, waiting for their victim to painfully die from a constricted airway or from the poison seeping into their bloodstream... but wait, no this time, the anticipation suddenly leads to confusion and panic as they are the ones who are starting to feel the symptoms of the poisoning. Yup. Perhaps trying to kill someone would work properly if they were the ones who were drugged.
Ok, aside from the exaggerated drama, lets have a think what this actually means... (Mr Turntable *wiki wiki* Break it down).
When you poison or drug yourself, you generally expect side effects. If the former is used, it's generally perceived with negative connotations but the former can have neutral connotations (i.e. she took some drugs to ease the migraine) as it is an acceptable form of self medication to relieve the pain felt. So, since this talks about poison, it must assume that one understands that it is done to the detriment of someone. Thus, you would expect that person to be suicidal or just trying to do a "Juliet". But, the twist comes with the latter half of the sentence.
"...and expecting someone else to die from it."
It seems almost contradictory. They've consumed the poison and expect that the effects will be felt by another person - common sense would assume that it cannot be true and that they are delusional and unstable. That it seems, would probably be the sort of air that this sentence is trying to imply - should they actually believe that it was possible.In short, if you have unforgiveness in your heart, sort it out or it will eventually kill you. If someone has hurt or wronged you, yes you have reason to pout and have a pity party for a second but hey, toughen up princess! Build a bridge quick and get over it or you'll be the one dying. Even worse, you probably would not know that you are.
Sounds so easy. There seems to be a simple solution to everything. But is it really? I'm not sure at the moment. Nothing seems to be as clear cut as it initially appears.
2 comments:
Well-written, dear Laney. I think I remember Colin preaching on that a little while ago - nice to remember.
Mind you, the other side of it is "instant forgiveness", which is just as dangerous. I think it's just as poisonous for people to say, "I forgive you" as soon as things feel better, but secretly harbour a bitter resentment. I think it's more important to treat the very deep hurts of a problem first and take the time to, as you say, "toughen up princess"(?) rather than stick a bandaid over it for a quick, fake fix. Whaddya reckon?
yeah quick fixes don't work!
It's kinda interesting cos I was discussing forgiveness with a friend and she said that while it isn't always possible to forgive someone instantly especially if they'd really hurt you (so not the hurt of a "ow she stepped on my foot" sort), you had to make a conscious decision in your head to forgive them as soon as you could. That if the head had made the decision, the heart would follow, even if it was over a longer period.
Hmm... yeah I guess the whole resentment factor would be a problem cos if you hadn't truly forgiven, then you can't actually heal. I think it's like having glass in your arm and wondering why the wound won't heal. If the glass is removed, you could say that it's "fine" but we know it would take a period of time for the skin to heal over and for the wound to actually disappear.
You're right - if you don't treat the deep hurts first, then it's a fake fix.
Thanks for reading and engaging with my thoughts. I've always appreciated our chats and you setting aside time for me. <3
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